More of 'My Dorky Life'

Well, today was certainly not a day that went anything at all like I had planned!

I was off work today, but had to drive down to pick up my first paycheck. I asked my daughter if she'd like to go with me so she could see where I work(it's a half hour away.) She said yes,so away we went.

First of all, I take the interstate to get to work,so as we merged onto the interstate, I see a state trooper in the left lane a few car lengths back, so I of course drive the speed limit . I was cracking up, because this trooper was in the left lane and he was going the speed limit!lol, which was causing a HUGE traffic bottleneck, as most drivers on this section of our interstate seem to think the speed limit is 80 mph. I told April "that man is evil,lol, he's forcing everyone to go the speed limit." He did this for OVER 20 MILES, it was hilarious to see what consternation this caused with drivers.

I mention to April when we're halfway to my work "Oh, shoot, I forgot to bring the cell phone." She says, "Geez, we'll probably get in a wreck or something." Famous last words.

We exit the interstate and are back on city roads, and I am slowing down with my blinker on to make a right turn to go to my workplace, when out of the corner of my eye I see a flash of something to my left. I had enough time to think "What the..?" and BOOM! a deer which was apparently running across the road SLAMS into my driver's side door and flips up over the front of the car!!!

I had a split second to think "It's going to come through the windshield" by which time it had already flipped over the front of the car and landed on the other side WITHOUT breaking the windshield,thank God.

I pull off the road and notice that my side mirror is hanging by a thread.When I get out of the car, I see that the deer has gone up a hill to the right of us, and seems to have his rear right leg injured. An ambulance which happened to be driving behind me pulls over for the driver to get out and ask me if we're OK as I'm getting out of the car. April is going "WHAT WAS THAT??!!" and she starts laughing nervously. I am shaking like a leaf, but tell the ambulance guy"yes, I think we're all right" and then we both gaze at the poor hanging side mirror housing and the deer hair all over my windshield. I said"I think that's all that happened to my car."(the broken side mirror)

and just then some middle aged guy on a bicycle rides up and says"Hey, here's your mirror,it isn't even broken!Wow,that happened SO FAST!That deer came from nowhere! I didn't even see it till it slammed into your car. And that was pretty cool,it did a flip across the front of your car!"

At this, we all turn and gaze at the deer, which is still standing on a hill above us, with it's right rear leg hanging kind of limp and skewed. And I am still shaking like a leaf,but starting to laugh myself now that I realize we are OK, and the damage isn't that bad, and why the heck can't I just have a NORMAL day?OTHER people can drive to work to pick up their paycheck and not have a kamikaze deer ram their car .....what must it be like, to be one of those people? I feel quite certain I will never know!

After talking to a police officer who stopped, we proceed to work to pick up my check. Since I was right at the entrance to my job, EVERYONE who was coming to work had seen us by the side of the road. So of course we are explaining what happened, and then we go to see my boss and I said,"Hey, when you hired me? You never mentioned the dangerous deer in the area!" and she is cracking up,because just YESTERDAY she had told someone in front of me "If anything strange is going to happen....it will happen to Kathi!" (She's worked with me before,lol)

Then I ask her "Does anyone have any duct tape? for me to keep my side mirror on the car for the drive home?" and she is falling down laughing, and says"Now, how REDNECK is THAT?"But we located some, and I taped my mirror on, no matter how 'redneck' that looked

April and I made the drive back home without incident, but then I finally look at my paycheck and discover that my weird day is NOT over yet!  Someone has made a HUGE mistake somewhere, as my paycheck is THREE  TIMES LARGER than I had calculated it would be and there is NO WAY that I am going to deposit this until I talk to someone!!

In talking to the payroll clerk at work, and then someone at the corporate office, we deduce that what happened was someone put my DEPT CODE (which is a very high number) as my RATE OF PAY!!

At first, what they wanted me to do was to just return the check, and then they would issue me a new one by next Tuesday!!

And I was nice, but I said "Hey, I have been waiting THREE WEEKS for this paycheck, because of the point in the pay period I started working ,and I am scheduled to work the next 3 days and I need money for gas for those next 3 days to get TO work!!I really can't wait 4 more days to have any cash."

So they work out a way for me to have some money after all.And then after all that, I started crying after I hung up the phone and wailed "I wish I could just have a NORMAL life!!!" and Tony gave me a hug and was chuckling and said "But what fun would THAT be?!" so after a few minutes I finally started laughing,too.

And that's how my day went. How was YOURS?