Wednesday, January 24, 2007

The Farewell (lol, I'm a Dork)

 I think I've mentioned before that I'm prone to dorkiness Yesterday, my plans were to go out to the boyfriend's house to say goodbye to his son one last time before he left for Basic.He was supposed to be leaving at one p.m.

I got a call at 9:24 a.m., saying the plans had changed and he'd be leaving at TEN A.M.!! Yikes!(and they live a little over 30 minutes away!)

So I hurriedly drove out there (naturally observing all speed limit laws, for any police or corrections officers--hi,son--who might be reading this) and arrived shortly before 10. No time to get all 'gushy' or sentimental, it was basically one quick hug and then he was taking off.

Then he ran back into the house for something he forgot, and so I went to the door to wave goodbye as he got back into the car with his ride....and I somehow managed to trip and get my foot caught in the gap at the top of the wooden step and start to fall forwards, and then catch myself by grabbing the door as it swung away from me. ( I did this while WAVING with my HAND, for Pete's sake,got my FOOT caught!.....the classic definition of a dork, I believe)

This was not exactly the picture I wanted to leave him with, of the 'folks back home",rofl. Judging by the look on his face? he was most likely saying to his ride "for heaven's sakes, get me AWAY from here as fast as you can!"

The good part about it is that his Dad didn't have any time to get sad or sentimental right then about his only son leaving....he was bent over laughing too hard.

Well, that's the story of the farewell that I wanted to share.

Tuesday, January 23, 2007

Dustin Leaves Today

So, Tony's son Dustin leaves for Army Basic Training today.  Best of luck to him, and we're very proud of him!

Tuesday, January 16, 2007

Condolences

Please keep Emma and her family in your prayers, as her grandfather passed away yesterday.

Friday, January 12, 2007

"The best laid plans of mice and men,often go awry"

(Quote adaptation from a Robert Burns poem )

Sheesh, do they ever "go awry" or "gang aft a-gley", however you wish to say it :) Thursday morning my plans were to go shopping for some cards for soldiers, and then go to work.

Instead, I ended up going to the ER with chest pains, and then spending the night in the hospital and having a Stress Test on a treadmill this morning. THANKFULLY, there is NOTHING wrong with my heart after all :) they have decided it's probably  GERD  and I've been given medication to treat that. So,thanks,God! that it wasn't anything life threatening! :)

(and,FYI,Stress tests on a treadmill ARE very stressful,LOL,in case you were wondering.)

I'm grateful to my family and friends, for all the support and all the prayers....there was a time period yesterday morning when I gained a deeper understanding of the word "terrified". And thanks,also (I guess?lol) for all the folks in my family who quoted my own words back at me, to get me to go to the ER...."It's better to go find out it's Nothing, than to worry about what it Could be." (note to self for future...always remember that platitudes you quote to others can someday be quoted back to you, and probably at a very Appropriate time, which can irk you, if you are a control freak who thinks they are in the middle of a major medical episode,lol.)

Seriously,bless Emma for acting first and panicking later....always the best thing to do in a crisis. Bless Ben, for being concerned enough to shave 15 minutes off a 30 minute drive to get himself there to hug me (and bless God that no policemen noticed him doing that,lol.) And bless Tony for saying "Grab my hand and I'll say a prayer" in the ER,because in my terror at the time I could only get about as far as "God..." in any prayer of my own. I'm sure the good Lord knew what I was Trying to say, but it gave me some Peace, to hear someone else put it into words.

Thanks,( I THINK?) to April and Kyle, for waiting until today to make fun of how silly I was from the medication they gave me last night.:) (to my face,anyway,lol, I'm sure they walked out snickering at me last night.)

And,again, bless all the rest of my family, for the prayers they started, and the other folks they got to also start praying, as soon as they found out what was going on. I love you all!

Well, that was My Thursday and Friday...how was Yours?

 

Tuesday, January 9, 2007

Things that make you go GRRR...(Part Two)

This is the second part of a post begun below, concerning two shows on CNN's Paula Zahn Now that were ostensibly about the changes in rules by China for foreign adoptions....but clearly became a show about something else entirely. The transcript link for the Jan.5 show is in the post below, and here is the transcript link for the second show aired Jan.8   http://transcripts.cnn.com/TRANSCRIPTS/0701/08/pzn.01.html

and then I have copied and pasted below the parts of the show regarding the Firday show and Chinese adoptions.

PAULA ZAHN, CNN ANCHOR: Coming up at the top of the hour, we shine a light on America's hidden intolerance that just lurks below the surface. Every night, we're finding and talking about these hidden secrets, bringing them out into the open.
Tonight, the question is: Who is fit to adopt? We continue our dialogue about the thousands of Americans who adopt babies from China, and China's new proposed rules for who isn't eligible. It's a sensitive issue many of you have let us know you feel passionately about................
We have been flooded with your e-mails, thousands of them since our segment on Friday about China's plan to tighten restrictions on foreigners adopting children. It's a controversial subject. And we brought it out in the open because of the potentially intolerant rules on who can adopt, only prospective parents who are thin enough, rich enough, and attractive enough.

Tonight, we are going to hear from some of those folks in passionate e-mails about how we handled the story, and about what some of you had to say about our panelists who were with us on Friday. And then we will give those panelists a chance to respond.

First, though, John Vause in Beijing tells us more about the proposed new adoption regulations.

(BEGIN VIDEOTAPE)

JOHN VAUSE, CNN CORRESPONDENT (voice-over): No one knows for certain just how many Chinese kids don't have a family, but 23 of them live here in the New Day Foster Home, on the outskirts of Beijing. And all of these children have special needs.

Doug Bush from Alabama is one of the American volunteers who run the home.

DOUG BUSH, NEW DAY FOSTER HOME: These children are -- are being adopted, for the most part, by families in America. VAUSE: It's been like that since New Day opened six years ago. Kids stay here, onaverage, 18 months. In fact, for childless couples across the United States, China has been a blessing. But, by May, the open door to Chinese kids may be closing a little, with the communist government imposing tough new criteria for hopeful parents. They must not be morbidly obese, must not have any facial deformities, and must not take antidepressants.

They need to have a net worth of $80,000 or more, and need to married couples, age between 30 and 50 -- so, no more singles allowed.

BUSH: The regulations will limit some families that I believe would make good -- good parents. But I do understand the reason for them.

VAUSE: China says, the new rules are meant to find the best parents for their homeless children. And with anecdotal evidence suggesting the number of orphans is decreasing, the authorities here can afford to be choosy.

KATE WEDGWOOD, CHINA PROGRAM DIRECTOR, SAVE THE CHILDREN: They're more stringent than, say, Vietnam or Guatemala, but less stringent than South Korea. And I think it's very normal for countries to have certain restrictions.

VAUSE (on camera): According to the U.S. State Department, last year, almost 7,000 Chinese kids found new homes in the United States, the most number of adoptions from any one country. And the main reason for that, this system is centrally controlled. And that means it's relatively efficient. It's predictable. And everyone knows the rules.

(voice-over): And, when those rules change, it may mean that a family somewhere will miss out on giving one of these kids a new home and a new life.

John Vause, CNN, Beijing.

(END VIDEOTAPE)

ZAHN: And, as I mentioned, we got thousands of e-mails about this segment. Here's why.

On Friday, we set out to talk about discrimination and the proposed regulations, but our panelists went in a different direction.

Here's what radio host Roland Martin said about adopting Chinese children.

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

ROLAND MARTIN, EXECUTIVE EDITOR, "THE CHICAGO DEFENDER": What's the big deal with Chinese children? Enlighten me, please. Help me out.

(LAUGHTER) (CROSSTALK)

ZAHN: You understand this better than anybody. Why don't we see more Americans adopting black foster children?

MARTIN: Well, that's -- I mean, that's my point.

ZAHN: Hispanic children?

MARTIN: I mean, I'm trying to figure out, what's the big deal with Chinese children?

(CROSSTALK)

MARTIN: Why the infatuation?

ZAHN: Well, do you think it's something with the -- the color of their skin? Is that what you're driving at?

MARTIN: I -- I don't know. I'm -- or maybe they think they can adopt a smart kid or something who is going to grow up to be a doctor.

SOLANGEL MALDONADO, ASSOCIATE PROFESSOR OF LAW, SETON HALL UNIVERSITY: Absolutely.

MARTIN: I don't know. All they need to realize, that that's called training, not just inherent; it is going to happen because just they're born.

Angel, can you help me out?

MALDONADO: Yes, absolutely.

I mean, this is something that I have been looking into for -- for a long time. Americans do have this love affair with girls from China. There is this belief, this perception, as irrational as it might be, that, if you adopt a little girl from China, she's going to be intelligent. She's going to be more lovable.

MARTIN: So, there's nothing...

(CROSSTALK)

MARTIN: ... porcelain doll?

(END VIDEO CLIP)

ZAHN: Radio host Cenk Uygur saw the question from a Muslim perception, which became clear as our conversation continued.

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

MARTIN: What is the infatuation with -- by Americans and other foreigners when it comes to adopting Chinese children?

That -- I mean, but that -- that is a real issue there. (CROSSTALK)

MARTIN: And -- and why do we avoid other children, and not just -- children who are here in America, who are looking for homes, and who just...

ZAHN: All right.

MARTIN: ... who, just like Chinese orphans, want a nice place to live.

(CROSSTALK)

ZAHN: But , realistically, how are you ever going to change that bias?

CENK UYGUR, RADIO TALK SHOW HOST: Well, you know, I think a lot of people are looking for Muslim children these days.

ZAHN: Yeah, right.

(LAUGHTER)

UYGUR: Yes. And, you know, because we started the Iraq war, and there's so many orphans. I'm sure they're getting a lot of Iraqi children, right?

(LAUGHTER)

UYGUR: No, of course. They are doing it because they think it's cute, and they're going to be smart. And it's really dumb, actually, of course.

And, so, Roland is right. It's all in the training. And -- and -- and it's a shame, because there's a -- all over the world, there's other kids that need to be adopted, especially in Africa.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

ZAHN: Sound like racism to you?

Well, it did to some of the people who wrote to us.

Here's what Karen had to say: "How can you allow guests to make blanket statements that parents who adopt from China only want porcelain dolls who are smart and well-behaved? The comments made by all three panelists clearly show that they are racists and ignorant about issues concerning adoption, adoptive parents, and U.S. citizens in general, not to mention Asian-American stereotypes."

Another e-mail, this one from Alice, reads: "Please help educate our wonderful country, instead of providing racist and negative stereotypes to international adoptive parents. Believe me, nobody goes through an international adoption to have a porcelain doll. We just want to be parents. It is a difficult, expensive, intrusive process that truly weeds out those who want to parent from those wanting a child for vanity."

And then we got this one from Laurie: "If CNN would have invited someone from the adoption community to participate on the panel, perhaps the show would have had actual substance, rather than becoming a forum for verbal bashing of the parents of international adoptees."

We're going to hear from Cenk Uygur and Roland Martin in just a little bit.

But, tonight, we are now going to hear from someone in the adoption community. One of the people who contacted us about Friday's segment is David Youtz. He is the president of the Greater New York Chapter of Families With Children From China. He and his wife have adopted four girls from China, including triplets, who joined the family just last year. And he has spent several years living in China, teaching English and learning Chinese. He joins me now.

Thank you so much for being with us.

DAVID YOUTZ, PRESIDENT, FAMILIES WITH CHILDREN FROM CHINA OF GREATER NEW YORK: Thank you, Paula. It's a pleasure to be here.

ZAHN: Thank you.

So, how insulting did you find those stereotypes that you just heard among our panelists?

YOUTZ: Well, as you heard, it stirred people up.

I think the -- the real difficulty was not so much that they were acting racist. I think they thought they were being funny, and -- and doing sort of a quick look at adoption.

The difficulty is that adoption is a very complex thing. And it really has to do with what's good for the child. And it's often very complex and difficult, far more, I think, than your panelists realize, to go ahead and form a family through international adoption.

ZAHN: Do you concede, though, that some of the stereotypes that they address do exist among some Americans?

YOUTZ: No, I don't think so.

You know, I think the key point here is that what parents in the United States want to do is form a family. And race is really not what's going on. The reason many, many Americans -- there are now something like 55,000 children who have been adopted by Americans into -- from China into American homes.

The reason that's been so popular, I think, is really the process. The process in China is very predictable. It's very consistent. It's quite fair. When you enter into it as an adoptive parent, you know roughly how long that process will take, what the paperwork is that you need, the costs. And, you know, it's a very clear and dependable process. And that's exactly what you want as an adoptive parent. ZAHN: So, is it a less dependable process than -- that -- when Roland Martin talks about the need for Americans to adopt black children here in -- in our own country?

YOUTZ: Right.

ZAHN: Are you saying the process is so onerous with their adoption, it's just much easier to go to China, and -- and bring those little kids home?

YOUTZ: Well, it's a very personal decision when a -- you know, an adoptive parent or a couple decide they want to do.

It's a very personal choice on which direction they go. And I absolutely applaud anyone who wants to go through a domestic adoption. There are thousands and thousands of children in foster care. And let's hope that as many as possible end up in great homes.

But, for an individual family deciding, you don't just say, I'm going to save this child or that child. It's really all about forming a family. It's not about rescuing someone. And I think that's where the panelists went astray.

Let's close with this e-mail from an adoptive parent. Her name is Alice. She says: "It is a disservice to label adoptive parents so shallow in their decisions. It is also a disservice to imply that Chinese children are always tainted" -- or -- excuse me -- "talented and gifted. It's one of the unfortunate Asian stereotypes that all Asians are smart and hardworking. Can you imagine the pressure and expectations this puts on less able Chinese children?"

Does she have a point there?

YOUTZ: Oh, absolutely. She's exactly on the money.

And that, I think, was what truly upset people, was the -- the program, which was supposed to, you know, burst stereotypes ended up pushing along old, tired stereotypes. Asian children are children. And we love them because they become members of our family. We don't want to deal with the stereotypes.

ZAHN: We appreciate your coming on.

YOUTZ: Thanks, Paula.

ZAHN: Hope you felt you were able to -- to get your piece tonight.

YOUTZ: I am. And I'm glad you listened to us. Thank you.

ZAHN: OK. Thank you.

We're committed to bringing intolerance out into the open on this show, even if it means holding up a mirror to some of our own feelings. In a minute, I'm going to be joined by an "Out in the Open" panel. It includes two of my guests from Friday's controversial discussion about adopting Chinese babies.

And, then a little bit later on, do parents have a right to stunt their daughter's growth because she's severely disabled, so it will be easier for them to take care of her?

We will be back with that debate.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK)

ZAHN: Another story we're bringing into the open tonight, a national trend that's affecting many historically black neighborhoods -- in a little bit, the changing face of South Central Los Angeles.

First, we're going to bring out into the open the passionate response we got to our discussion Friday about our segment on China's new proposed adoption rules.

Some of the things our panelists said really touched a raw nerve, got a lot of people very upset, even accusing our panelists of racism. We got thousands of e-mails about the segment.

And joining me now, two members of Friday's panel, Roland Martin, executive editor of "The Chicago Defender" newspaper, host of "The Roland S. Martin Show," and Cenk Uygur, a host of "The Young Turks" on the Air America Radio Network. Also with me, Ginny Gong, president of the Organization of Chinese Americans.

Welcome, all.

I want to start off with an e-mail, Roland, that I would like you to respond to.

MARTIN: Mmm-hmm.

ZAHN: And it says: "To imply that we, as adoptive parents, adopt Chinese babies because they are smarter than other races or cuter than other cases is just simply wrong. To say it is in the 'in thing' to do isjust insulting. To ask why we don't adopt Muslim children, well, it is against the law in Muslim countries. How crazy to even make such a strange statement, that we are afraid of what would happen in a chemistry class."

Roland, first of all, what do you say to the charges that you were a racist by saying some of what you said on Friday?

MARTIN: Well, first and foremost, anybody who knows that definition of what being a racist means, having power over someone, that wouldn't apply.

What we were talking about -- frankly, we were debunking the stereotypes, making fun of those stereotypes, people who do that. Now, Angel Maldonado from Seton Hall University, had the research. And what she said, there is evidence there of individuals who make adoptions based upon race.

And, so, anybody who watches that, the question I asked was, what is the infatuation in America with adopting Chinese children? She gave her response, in terms of based upon -- in terms of how some people feel about Chinese girls. We then took off on that particular statement. Now...

ZAHN: But didn't you also make it clear, Roland, that there seemed to be a preference of these -- these Chinese babies, one of our guests referring to them as porcelain dolls, over black kids?

MARTIN: Well, no, no -- right. I -- first of all, the porcelain dolls statement was still in response to Angel's comment about them being -- you know, being the -- the cute girls.

I raised that question because, again, I asked, OK, if there is such demand in America for Chinese children, then what about American children? Now, the guest that you had on the air, you asked him the question about whites adopting African-American children. What did he say? He said, well, that's a personal preference as to how people want to put together their family.

ZAHN: But -- but, to be perfectly fair, Roland, he also made it clear that -- that the process in China is much more predictable than the process perhaps in other countries. And -- and -- and, although he didn't say that, I think you could extrapolate from that -- that maybe it's -- it's sometimes, in much cases, much tougher to adopt an African-American child than a Chinese child.

MARTIN: Well, are -- are you meaning in America? Because, again...

ZAHN: In America.

MARTIN: Well, again, and so, I also have e-mails from people who have actually adopted kids in America, and they say, it -- it is not that -- as difficult.

ZAHN: OK.

MARTIN: And, so, again, you -- you have (INAUDIBLE) on both.

The point there, we were not criticizing individuals, everyone who adopts a Chinese kid. We were talking about people who do adopt based upon stereotypes. We're criticizing those stereotypes.

ZAHN: Do you plead guilty, Cenk, to impugning the -- impugning the motives of Americans who adopt children from China?

UYGUR: I'm a talk show host, Paula, so I'm never guilty of anything, and I'm never wrong.

(LAUGHTER)

UYGUR: No.

Listen, there is...

(CROSSTALK)

ZAHN: It must be great to be perfect.

(LAUGHTER)

UYGUR: There are two separate issues here. The charges of racism, I think, are absolutely ridiculous. We were pointing out a false stereotype, and saying how false it was.

Now, on the other hand, if you -- is race a factor in some people's decision to adopt children in different countries or in this country? Absolutely, it is. It would be ridiculous to say that it isn't for anybody.

For example, off the air, Professor Maldonado was talking about how you get a 25 percent discount if you adopt an African-American child, someone who has any African-American blood in them in America. You get a 50 percent discount if they're fully African-American.

And that's -- to say that that is -- that there's no supply-and- demand issues, that there's no race issues there is ridiculous.

ZAHN: All right.

UYGUR: On the other hand, was I overbroad in saying that that -- implying, in my one sentence, that that was the sole factor? Absolutely.

I was overbroad -- I think overbroad, to the point of being wrong. I think there are a lot of factors involved. I think there are a lot of great people who do adoption for many good reasons. And God bless them for it.

ZAHN: He actually admitted...

GINNY GONG, NATIONAL PRESIDENT, ORGANIZATION OF CHINESE AMERICANS: He did.

GONG: ... that he was wrong.

You said you weren't going to admit that tonight at the -- at the top of this interview.

(LAUGHTER)

ZAHN: So, Ginny, the bottom line here is -- is, clearly, our panel struck a nerve.

Are you satisfied with both Roland's and Cenk's explanation, that -- that what this simply was, was a discussion about stereotypes people have had for a very long time about adopting various races of babies?

GONG: I don't -- I don't know if the issue is whether I'm satisfied, because, certainly, it's the parents, I think, that, really, it hit a nerve with.

You know, for me, creating a family is a very difficult decision to make. And a lot of it is just the process that David talked about. And, also, you know, I think there is some kind of a concern, maybe, that, if someone was adopted here, you know, what if, down the line, the parents emerge and decided that they, you know, wanted to claim the child back?

I certainly think that that's a factor as well. But the process is streamlined, in that on the -- that it was quite liberal and quite fair, and that, if you really wanted to go through this process, there was some predictability to it. And I think that that's a piece of it.

MARTIN: You know -- you know, Paula, I received some e-mails from different people, who also were exhibiting their stereotypes, saying they did not want some crackhead baby mama to come back and get their children.

I know of individuals who are very good friends of mine who have adopted, and they're -- in America, African-American children. And they were white, as well, who were not concerned with that, as well.

And, so, people have different reasons as to why they adopt.

GONG: Right.

MARTIN: Absolutely.

But people who adopt because they want adopt, they want to do a family, that's fine. But to deny that people -- that race doesn't -- is not a factor, and you -- you can say, well, I have never heard it.

The evidence is there. And, so, if someone was offended by it, I'm sorry they were offended by these -- these stereotypes. The key is, are we being honest as to how people adopt? There are people who, frankly, may be more comfortable adopting a Chinese child vs. an African-American or an Hispanic child.

And, if the issue is, again, streamlining the process in America, well, then, we can work towards that. But just to say, well, it's easier there than here, you know, you -- you have to really question that, because other people have done it, and they have -- and they have been very fine with their choices in America.

ZAHN: Roland Martin, we have got to leave it there.

Cenk Uygur, Ginny Gong, thank you, all.

(CROSSTALK)

ZAHN: Glad to have you all on board tonight.
---------------------------------
I'm not sure the second show made me feel any better than the first show? Other than the partial apology by one of the panelists.
I'm passing all this on so that, if you'd like to tell CNN your own thoughts about these two shows? The link is here  
 
I've already sent them My thoughts!!!

Things that make you go GRRRR....(Part One)

I've mentioned before that my   sister and brother-in-law  are in the process of adopting a child from China.

In December, China released some rule changes for foreign adoptions that will take effect on May 1. Click here: VOA News - China Changes Adoption Rules for Foreigners

While this won't affect my sis and bro-in-law, they were naturally interested in a show on CNN this past Friday (Jan.5) on Paula Zahn Now that was going to be covering a story about the rule changes. I missed that show, but my sister alerted me afterwards to check out the transcript. The link is here  http://transcripts.cnn.com/TRANSCRIPTS/0701/05/pzn.01.html

and I have copied and pasted the parts of the transcript pertaining to Chinese adoption.

ZAHN: So how would you feel if someone told you you couldn't adopt a baby because you're not thin enough, not rich enough, nor attractive enough?

We're bringing this story out in the open tonight because that's exactly what's about to happen when Americans try to adopt children from China, and some people say that is downright discriminatory. China is the most popular country Americans go to for foreign adoptions. Last year, nearly 6,500 Chinese children found parents right here in the U.S. John Vause is in Beijing tonight and he joins me live. So, John, what are some of these restrictions that are about to be put in place that we need to be aware of?


JOHN VAUSE, CNN CORRESPONDENT: Well, Paula, the Chinese government says these new measures are all about finding better homes for Chinese orphans, so as of this coming May, all foreigners, not just Americans, but anyone from overseas wanting to adopt a Chinese orphan must meet some of these following criteria.
They must not be morbidly obese, in other words, a body mass index of over 40, they must not have facial deformities, they must not take antidepressants.

On the other side of the equation, they must have a net worth of $80,000 or more. They must earn over $30,000 a year. They must also be, this is one of the biggest changes, they also must be a man and a woman who have, in fact, been married for at least two years, aged between 30 and 50. So in other words, no singles.

In the past, China was one of the few countries in the world who would allow singles to adopt kids. They've never allowed gay adoption but they have allowed singles in limited numbers to adopt kids but it seems that will be changing as well, Paula.

ZAHN: So what is the Chinese government officially saying about this, and why they want to institute these changes?

VAUSE: Well, the Chinese government is making no apologies for the new criteria. An official that we spoke to Friday told us in part, Quote, "Our job is to help the homeless children find warm families, rather than just children for childless families."

At the same time we're insisting there's been no change to the actual adoption policy. They're just introducing a preference system, because quite simply, there are so many foreigners who want to come here that they just outnumber the orphans who are available for adoption, and there are lengthy waiting periods for foreigners wanting Chinese kids. They can wait for a year, in many cases sometimes more, Paula.

ZAHN: John Vause, thanks so much for the update.

Joining me now, an attorney Sondra Solovay, an author of "Tipping the Scales of Justice: Fighting Weight-Based Discrimination." She also has a new book coming out later this year. Welcome back.

Some of these rules, I think, are a little bit easier for us to swallow than others. I think some people think it's probably pretty justified that prospective parents have enough money to care for a children, but what about weight restrictions, what about facial deformities, and how that could compromise someone's ability to adopt?

SONDRA SOLOVAY, AUTHOR, "TIPPING THE SCALES OF JUSTICE": These restrictions are definitely troubling. I certainly empathize with the difficult decision of figuring out which adoptive family is going to be the best for a child and the children we're most concerned about. But you simply can't tell by looking at someone if they're going to be a good adoptive parent. We don't have to rent "Mommy Dearest" to remember that a pretty face doesn't mean a pretty family.

And certainly you can't tell the amount of love a parent has in their heart by looking at the number on their bathroom scale.

ZAHN: But on the flipside of all this, doesn't china have the right to create whatever rules it wants to, no matter how unpalatable some of them might seem?

SOLOVAY: Sure, they have the right, they have the obligation to do what they think is best to look out for their children. That's absolutely true. It's an interesting point as well, because some of these agencies that are in the U.S. are going to be in quite a predicament, caught between two different rules, rules in the United States prohibiting them from discriminating based on disability, based on weight, based on marital status and the restrictions that China imposed so it's difficult for the agencies, too, but I think we need to bring our attention back to the children and the idea is to find the children the best, most loving homes they can, and those homes don't come in a particular weight limit or a particular size.

In fact, we have this idea, I suppose, of a traditional home. But when children come from China to the U.S., many will be placed in homes that are going to be mixed race or mixed ethnicity anyway. These aren't traditional homes and it's the diversity in the U.S. that makes those families understand that they have the same rights as any other family.

ZAHN: How many angry calls are you taking from prospective parents out there about these new regulations?

SOLOVAY: I expect my office is going to be absolutely flooded with calls not only from parents, but from the agencies themselves, wondering about their rights and responsibilities. For example, in San Francisco, you can't discriminate based on weight, so an agency in San Francisco is going to have a difficult time walking that line.

ZAHN: Well, Sondra Solovay, we're going to leave that there and get more reaction now. Thank you for your time. From our panel.

SOLOVAY: Thank you.

ZAHN: One more time. Cenk Uygur, Roland Martin, Solangel Maldonado.

Obviously the Chinese government is making it clear it wants to be more selective will prospective parents, it wants to place these children in the best family environment it can. Isn't that justified?

MALDONADO: Absolutely. I think we all know that China is a sovereign country. It has the right to place whatever restrictions on foreigners who are seeking to adopt their children that it wants. And adoption is really about supply and demand, and the reality is that there are many more Americans, many more Westerners seeking to adopt children from China than there are children available so the Chinese government can decide to do whatever it wants.

MARTIN: OK, why? What's the big deal with Chinese children? Enlighten me, please, help me out.

ZAHN: You understand this better than anybody. Why don't we see more Americans adopting black foster children?

MARTIN: That's my point. What's the big deal with Chinese children? Why the infatuation?

ZAHN: You think it's something with the color of their skin? Is that what you're driving at?

MARTIN: Maybe they think they can adopt a smart kid that is going to grow up to be a doctor? I don't know. They need to realize that's called training, not just inherent, it will happen when they're born.

Angel, help me out.

MALDONADO: Absolutely. This is something I've been looking into for a long time. Americans have this love affair with girls from China. There is this belief, this perception, irrational as it might be that if you adopt a little girl from China, she's going to be intelligent, she's going to be more lovable.

MARTIN: Like the porcelain doll.

MALDONADO: We definitely see that idea of the beautiful Chinese little girl, as compared to do, they really want to adopt a black boy.

ZAHN: What difference does it make if the prospective parent has a facial deformity and the prospective parent weighs 70 more pounds than the scale says they should weigh.

UYGUR: I love the idea of them weighing people. All right. So you know, first of all, okay, so gay parents are out. That's a clear rule, but then also Dennis Hastert's out because he's way too fat. They put him on the scale, sorry. But I'd probably be out.

I don't know, maybe I'd have to go on an exercise regimen, to do the body mass indexes they pinch you in all of these different places.

ZAHN: You can fake it, suck it in.

UYGUR: Not me.

MARTIN: Paula, you raise the question - China, first of all, they do have the right to do it, but the flipside is what is the infatuation by Americans and other foreigners when it comes to adopting Chinese children? That is a real issue there, and why do we avoid other children and not just -- children who are here in America, who are looking for homes, and who just like Chinese orphans want a nice place to live.

ZAHN: But realistically, how are you ever going to change that bias?

UYGUR: I think a lot of people are looking for Muslim children these days.

ZAHN: Yeah, right.

UYGUR: Because we started the Iraq war and there's so many orphans. I'm sure they're getting a lot of Iraqi children, right? No, of course, they think it's cute and they're smart and it's really dumb, actually, of course. Roland's right, it's all in the training and it's a shame because all over the world there's other kids that need to be adopted especially in Africa, but for once, the celebrities are doing the right thing there trying to foster that.

MARTIN: Call the queen of Africa, Angelina Jolie. She can hook you up.

MALDONADO: I think what we need to do is we need to break down some of the misconceptions. For example, people believe if they're adopting a child from China, the child is going to be healthier than a child they adopt in the United States and that is just not true. Even if the child is born ...

ZAHN: It defies logic. The quality of the medical care many of these kids have suffered through the first several months of life.

MARTIN: What also ignores logic is that China is having an explosion when it comes to obesity as well so maybe they should start their own million pound challenge like we started in Chicago to deal with Chinese folks who don't want to have overweight kids.

ZAHN: What are some of the other assumptions you think people in America make about the native intelligence of children based on whether you're Hispanic - We had a guest on the other night when you were with us suggesting that Hispanic parents don't take education as seriously as some other sets of our population. There's a very complicated picture here.

UYGUR: And America is changing and some of the assumptions are going to change because of that. What really happens isn't of course that Asians are smarter. Immigrant families foster a culture where they work hard and emphasize education so Jewish families went through that, Asian families went through that. But now Eastern European families are coming and doing the same thing and African families are coming and doing the same thing. So I can't wait for 10, 20 years down the line, everybody's like I've got to have an African child. Because they're all geniuses.

MARTIN: Remember, those are learned traits that you learn based upon how you have been raised.

UYGUR: Of course.

MARTIN: You are simply not born, hey that, kid will have a great work ethic because they were born to an immigrant family. It simply doesn't work that way because you got some lazy immigrant families. What do you think the assumptions Americans make about kids of Asian descent even here in America, they'll work hard, they'll own their store someday.

UYGUR: They'll be brilliant.

ZAHN: All right. Hispanic ...

MALDONADO: Well the idea about Hispanic kids, it's sort of mixed. I think the stereotypes about Hispanic kids are both positive and negative. They believe that Hispanic kids are likely to work harder than black kids, but they also believe that they're not going to be as intelligent as Asian kids.

ZAHN: Muslim kids.

UYGUR: They're going to grow up to be violent.

Who is adopting a Muslim kid? Has anyone adopted a Muslim kid in the last 20 years in America?

MARTIN: You've got somebody sitting there saying, keep the Muslim kid out of chemistry class. Keep them away.

ZAHN: How about black kids?

Do you think the average American out there makes the assumption they'll be lazy and never make it through high school?

MARTIN: I think they probably assume they're going to sing for them like Jay Z and play like in the NBC.

ZAHN: Anybody would love to have Jay Z's career.

MARTIN: I'd rather have Bob Johnson's. He's a billionaire and Jay Z isn't.

ZAHN: Thank you, Roland Martin, Solangel Maldonado. Thank you, all. Appreciate your time.

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The above got me pretty upset. (feel free to tell me what you think,lol) As one person I know said, this read like some kind of high school skit. The racist comments struck me as particularly offensive. I still find it astonishing that this was put out there on television...it seems an extremely POORLY researched show, with offensive comments from panelists who largely seem to have no expertise in anything other than being arrogant,rude, and small-minded.
 
My sister passed this on because there was apparently such an uproar by the foreign adoption community that CNN decided to readdress the issue in a show last night.(Jan.8) (
I will pass on the transcript for that in a second post(as it was too long to cover in one post.)